英語閱讀 趣味幽默篇

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1、Section II 趣味幽默篇Passage 13Henry was an office worker in a big city. He worked very hard and enjoyed traveling in his holidays.He usually went to the seaside, but one year he saw an advertisement in a newspaper. “Enjoy country life. Spend a few weeks at West Hill Farm. Good food. Fresh air. Horse rid

2、ing. Walking. Fishing. Cheap and interesting.”“This sounds a good idea,” he thought. “Ill spend a month at West Hill Farm. I think I can enjoy horse riding, walking and fishing. Theyll make a change from sitting by the seaside and swimming.”He wrote to the farmer. In the letter he said that he would

3、 like to spend all of July there. Then on the first of July, he left for West Hill Farm.But four days later, he returned home.“What was wrong with West Hill Farm?” his best friend, Ed, asked him. “Didnt you enjoy country life?”“Country life was very good,” Henry said. “But there was another problem.

4、”“Oh. What?”“Well,” he said, “the first day I was there a sheep died, and we had roast mutton for dinner.”“Whats wrong with that?” Ed asked. “Fresh meat is the best.”“I know, but on the second day a cow died, and we had roast beef for dinner.”“Lucky you!”“You dont understand,” Henry said. “On the th

5、ird day a pig died and we had roast pork for dinner.”“A different meat every day,” Ed said loudly, “ and you are complaining!”“Let me finish,” Henry said. “On the fourth day the farmer died, and I didnt dare (敢)stay for dinner!”1.How did Henry find out about the farm?A. He saw it in a newspaper adve

6、rtisement. B. His best friend told him.C. He wrote to the farmer. D. Maybe he learned it from the radio.2. Henry came back home several days later because _.A. he didnt like the country life at all B. the farmer wasnt friendly to himC. his holiday was over D. he thought he might have to eat the farm

7、er3. “and you are complaining!”, the word “complain” means _.A.夸獎(jiǎng) B.說三道四 C.抱怨 D.故弄玄虛4.Which of the following sentences is true?A. Ed could eat a different kind of meat every day.B. Henry thought he could enjoy a change.C. Henry couldnt think of anything else to do, so he went to the farm.D. The farm

8、er died because of the bad meat he ate.5.Which is the best title for the passage?A. What a beautiful farm! B. Have a good time.C.A short holiday D. Henry and the farmer.Passage 14After returning from her round trip, the angry woman stood outside the ticket office of the station. “The railway owes me

9、 12 pounds,” she said to Harry Jenks, the young man working at the office.” You sold me a ticket for May 22nd, but there was no ship from Jersey that night. So my daughter and I had to stay in a hotel. It cost me 12 pounds.”Harry was worried. He remembered selling the woman a return ticket. “Come in

10、to the office, Madam,” he said politely. “Ill just check the Jersey timetable for May 22nd.”The woman and her little girl followed him inside. She was quite right, as Harry soon discovered. There was no sailing on May 22nd. How could he have made such a careless mistake? He shouldnt have sold her a

11、ticket for that day. Wondering what to do, he smiled at the child. “You look sun burnt,” he said to her. “Did you have a nice holiday in Jersey?”“Yes,” she answered, shyly. “The beach was lovely. And I can swim too!”“Thats fine,” said Harry. “My little girl cant swim a bit yet. Of course, shes only

12、three”“Im four,” the child said proudly. “Ill be four and a half.”Harry turned to the mother. “I remember your ticket, Madam,” he said. “But you didnt get one for your daughter, did you?”“Er, well” the woman looked at the child. “I meanshe hasnt started school yet, shes only four.”“A four-year-old c

13、hild must have a ticket, Madam. A childs return ticket to Jersey costs let me see 13.50 pounds. The law is the law, but since the mistake is mine.”The woman stood up, took the childs hand and left the office.1. The woman was angry because _.A. she couldnt use the ticket for her round tripB. she had

14、to return home a day earlier than she had plannedC. she spent more money than she had expectedD. Harry had sold her a ticket to Jersey where there was no sailing2. Harry was worried _.A.the woman was angry with himB.he had not done his work carefullyC.the Jersey timetable was wrongD.the little girl

15、didnt have a return ticket3. Harry started talking to the little girl _.A.because he was in trouble and did not know what to doB.because he had a little girl about the same age as this girlC.because he wanted to be friendly to the little girl who looked so niceD.when he suddenly realized that he cou

16、ld find a way out from the little girl4. When Harry said, “The law is the law, but since the mistake was mine” he meant that _.A.they must follow it without other choice, even though the mistake was hisB.he had to be strict with the woman because of the law, although he didnt want toC.the woman had

17、to pay him 1.50 pounds and the railway would pay her for the hotelD.she should pay 1.50 pounds, but he had made a mistake, she could go without paying5. The woman left the office without saying anything because _.A.she wanted to go home and get money for the childs ticketB.she was so angry that she

18、didnt want to have anything more to do with the young manC.she was moved (感動(dòng)) by Harrys kindnessD.she knew she would have to pay the railway if she insisted (堅(jiān)持)Passage 15Three travelers, Allan, Carl and Paul were sitting on the chairs in a train station. They were waiting for a train that was very

19、late.To pass the time, they began talking to each other.At first, they talked about the weather and their work. Then Paul said, Tell mewhat would you most like to do if your doctor tell you that you have only three months to live?The other two men thought about this for a while, then Carl spoke.“Wel

20、l,” he said, “if I have only three months to live, Ill take all my money out of the bank and go to foreign countries for holidays with my best friend, Erik. Id like to travel to the places in the world as many as possible. And Ill stay at the best hotels and then eat the best food. I think Ill have

21、a wonderful time.”“Thats very interesting.” Paul said.With these words, he turned to the other man, saying, “And what about you?”“Ill tell you a secret,” Allan said. “I always want to be a racing driver. So if I have only three months to live, the first thing Id like to do is to sell my house. With

22、the money Ill buy the fastest car in the world. Maybe I can enter all the big motor races.”Then he laughed, I might even end up (以而告終) world champion.”“Now its your turn,” Allan went on, “If your doctor tell you the bad news, what would you most like to do?”“Oh,” said Paul with a smile. “Ill go and

23、see another doctor.” 1.The three men were talking _.A. in the post office B. in the waiting roomC. on the train D. on the chairs2.The man called _ answered the question first.A. Carl B. Allan C. Erik D. Paul3.The men began to talk about the weather and the work because they _.A. didnt know anything

24、new B. wanted to pass the time quicklyC. had nothing to do D. were very interested in each others work 4.I might even end up world champion. Here the word champion means _in Chinese.A.名人 B.賽車手 C.大款 D.冠軍5.Which sentence is right according to the passage?A. The train didnt arrive on time. B. Paul want

25、ed to buy a racing car very much.C. Allan was the second man to answer the question. D. Carl didnt like traveling at all.Passage 16An English traveler found himself in Norway with only enough money to buy the ticket for his journey back home. As he knew that it would take him only two days to get to

26、 England, he decided that he could easily spend the time without food. So he bought a ticket and got on the ship. The man closed his ears to the sound of the lunch bell. When dinnertime came, he didnt go to dinning room, saying that he was not feeling very well. The next morning he still didnt have

27、breakfast and at lunchtime he again stayed in his room. But at dinnertime he was so hungry that he went to the dinning room and ate everything the waiter put in front of him. He got ready for the quarrel.“Bring me the bill,” he said. “The bill, sir?” said the waiter in surprise. “There isnt any bill

28、. On our ship meals are included (包括) in the money for the ticket,” said the waiter.1.The story happened _.A. in England B. on a ship from Norway to England C. in Norway D. on a ship from England to Norway2.Why didnt the traveler go to the dinning room first?A.Because he had no moneyB.Because he did

29、nt feel very wellC.Because he didnt want to eat anythingD.Because he didnt hear the sound of the bell3.The traveler went to the dinning room to eat something because _.A.his friend had given him some moneyB.the waiter had asked him to change his mindC.he learned that there was no bill on the shipD.h

30、e was too hungry4.How many meals did the traveler have on the ship?A. Only one B. Two C. Three D. None5.After the traveler finished eating, _.A.he had a quarrel with waiter over the billB.he drank a lot C.he asked the waiter to bring him the change(零錢)D.he came to know that travelers on the ship had

31、 free meals Passage 17 A farmer had a cow. He took very good care of this cow and one day when it was ill, he was very worried. He telephoned the vet.“Whats the problem?” The vet asked him when he arrived.“My cows ill,” the farmer said. “I dont know whats the matter with her. Shes lying down and won

32、t eat. Shes making a strange noise.”The vet looked over the cow. Shes certainly ill, he said, and she needs to take some very strong medicine.He took a bottle out of his box, put two pills into his hand and said, Give her these. The pills should make her better.“How should I give them to her?” the f

33、armer asked.The vet gave him a tube (管子)and said, Put this tube in her mouth, then put the pills in the tube and blow. Thatll make it.The next day the vet came to the farm again. The farmer was sitting outside his house and looked more worried.“Hows your cow?” the vet asked.“No change,” the farmer s

34、aid, “and Im feeling very strange myself.”“Oh?” the vet said, Why?“I did what you said,” the farmer answered. “I put the tube in the cows mouth and then put two pills down it.”“And?” the vet asked.“The cow blew first,” the farmer said.1.In the story, the vet must be _.A. the farmers friend B. a milk

35、 factory C. a hospital for cows D. a doctor for animals2.The farmer asked the vet for help when his cow _A. couldnt lie down B. didnt eat the pills C. couldnt make any noise D. was ill3.What medicine did the vet give the farmer?A. Bottle of pills. B. A long tube.C. Two pills. D. A small box.4.The ve

36、t taught the farmer how _.A. to blow the tube B. to make the cow take the pillsC. to take the medicine D. to put the tube in his mouth5.Which of the following is true?A. The farmer ate the pills himself.B. The cow got better after taking the medicine.C. The vet came to help farmer change the cow the

37、 next day.D. The farmer waited for the vet outside his house the next day.Passage 18Several years ago, a television reporter was talking to three of the most important people in America. One was a very rich banker, another owned one of the largest companies in the world, and the third owned many bui

38、ldings in the center of New York.The reporter was talking to them about being important.“How do we know if someone is really important?” the reporter asked the banker.The banker thought for a few moments and then said, “I think anybody who is invited to the Whiter House to meet the President of the

39、United States is really important.”The reporter then turned to the owner of the very large company. “Do you agree with that?” she asked.The man shook his head, “No. I think the President invites a lot of people to the White House. Youd only be important if while you were visiting the President, ther

40、e was a telephone call from the president of another country, and the President of the US said he was too busy to answer it.”The reporter turned to the third man. “Do you think so?”“No, I dont.” he said. “I dont think that makes the visitor important. That makes the President important.”“Then what w

41、ould make the visitor important?” the reporter and the other two men asked.“Oh, I think if the visitor to the White House was talking to the President and the phone rang, and the President picked up the receiver, listened and then said, its for you.”1.This story happened in _.A. England B. America C

42、. Japan D. Australia2.There are _ in this passage.A. two men and two women B. three men and one woman C. three women and one man D. four women3.The banker thought _.A.he was really important because he was a rich bankerB.the visitor to the White House was really importantC.the visitor who met the Pr

43、esident of the United StatesD. the reporter was really important4.The owner of the very large company thought _.A.she was really important because she owned one of the largest companiesB.the banker was really importantC.the owner of many buildings in the center of New York was really importantD. the

44、 visitor would be really important if while he was visiting the President, the President would not answer any telephone call5.The owner of many buildings thought _.A.he was really important because he owned many buildings in the center of New YorkB.the owner of the very large company was really impo

45、rtant C.the visitor was really important if he talking to the President and the President received a telephone call for the visitorD.the person who worked in the White House was really importantPassage 19Three men traveling on a train began a conversation about the worlds greatest wonders.“In my opi

46、nion,” the first man said, “the Egyptian pyramids are the worlds greatest wonder. Although they were built thousands of years ago, they are still standing. And remember: the people who built them had only simple tools. They did not have the kind of machinery that builders and engineers have today.”“

47、I agree that the pyramids in Egypt are wonderful,” the second man said, “but I do not think they are the greatest wonder. I believe computers are more wonderful than the pyramids. They have taken people to the moon and brought them back safely. In seconds，they carry out mathematical calculations tha

48、t would take a person a hundred years to do.”He turned to the third man and asked, “What do you think is the greatest wonder in the world？”The third man thought for a long time，and then he said, “Well，I agree that the pyramids are wonderful, and I agree that computers are wonderful, too. However，in

49、my opinion, the most wonderful thing in the world is this thermos.”And he took a thermos out of his bag and held it up.The other two men were very surprised. “A thermos？”they exclaimed. “But thats a simple thing.”“Oh, no，its not, ”the third man said. “In the winter you put in a hot drink and it stay

50、s hot. In the summer you put in a cold drink and it stays cold. How does the thermos know whether its winter or summer？”1.The underlined word “thermos” means in Chinese “ _ ”.A.電冰箱 B.洗衣機(jī) C.電風(fēng)扇 D.保溫瓶2.The three men could not agree on what the worlds greatest wonder was because _.A. they could not thi

51、nk of anything very wonderfulB. they all had different ideasC. they could not prove that their opinions were rightD. the journey ended too soon3.The first man thought the pyramids were the most wonderful things in the world because _.A. they were very beautiful B. they were EgyptianC. they had been

52、built with very simple toolsD. they could do mathematical calculations4.The third man thought a thermos was the most wonderful thing in the world because _.A. it lasted longer than the pyramids B. it cost less than a computerC. he thought it knew whether it was winter or summerD. the other two men w

53、ere surprised when he told them about it5.The third man was not very clever because _.A. he could not think of anything to sayB. he did not understand how a thermos worksC. he did not think the pyramids were wonderful D. he did not know anything about computersPassage 20An old man was going home lat

54、e one night with his horse and cart after a days hard work. When he was not far from his house, the light on the cart went out. He tried but could not mend it.He was near his home, and so he went along the road without a light. When a policeman saw this, he stopped the old carter.Wheres your light?

55、asked the policeman. No one may take a cart along a road at night without a light. You know that. Youve broken the law.I had a light, said the old man, but it has just gone out.I dont believe that story, said the policeman. He took out a book and got ready to write. Whats your name and where do you

56、live? he asked.Please dont take my name, said the old man. My house is just there. You can see it from here. I had a light nearly the whole way. I havent come far without a light.You came all the way without a light. Whats your name?The carter quickly took the policemans hand and put it down on the

57、top of the light. The light was still hot, and burnt the policemans hand. He jumped and he was very angry.Now, what do you think? said the carter. Did I come all the way without a light?1.In the passage Cart is _.A. something like a car B. something like a lightC. something pulled by a horse D. some

58、thing with a light2.The old man drove home _.A. on the back of his horse B. late one nightC. very late every night D. with a policeman3.Where did the policeman stop the old man?A. Near his home. B. At the traffic lights.C. Under a road light. D. Far from his house.4.The cart was stopped by the polic

59、eman because _.A. the old man didnt have a light B. the policeman didnt believe the old mans wordsC. the old man did not want to tell his nameD. the old mans light wasnt on5.How did the old man make the policeman believe (相信) his words?A. He made the policeman touch the light.B. He jumped and shoute

60、d angrily.C. He made the policeman angry.D. He burnt the policemans hands.Passage 21Ellen Parker was worried about her health. She could not walk very quickly and it was difficult for her to climb stars. She was soon out of breath (氣喘吁吁).“I suppose I had better go to the doctor,” she thought.She wen

61、t to the doctor and told him her problem.“Im not surprised at all,” he said. “Its obvious what your problem is.”He looked her over then gave her some advice.“If you dont do what I say, Mrs. Parker,” he said, “you will have a heart attack. It could kill you.”Ellen Parker was very worried as she left

62、the doctors. She knew that she had to take his advice but that it would not be easy and it would take time.The next day she went shopping. The first shop she went into was a butchers shop (肉鋪).“Id like ten pounds of steak (牛排), please,” she said.“Certainly, madam,” the butcher replied and went into the cold room and f